There are an endless amount of characters in the workplace.
Theres the lady you find in the break room, always on a diet and commenting on your weight (God help you if you are proportionate, she will eat you alive). The guy who shows off way too many baby pictures of his not-that-cute-kid. The girl who stays in her office with the door shut, even during fire drills. And the dreaded over-talker who never gets the hint (which might explain why that one girl stays in her office).
We all play roles in our workplaces, many of which are unique to only our office. But theres a standard cast of characters as well. You can find varieties of them anywhere you go, but they all share the same skill sets. They are the ones who will succeed and the ones who will fail.
In lieu of filling you with fluffy this is what a successful person looks like talk, I thought Id take the opposite route. The following is a list of people who stand out for all the wrong reasons. Fair warning: If you dont know who this person is at your office, it might be you.
The Gullible One.
If Ive learned anything over the years, its that you should never believe everything a company says. Dont believe them when they say they dont expect layoffs (the mere mention of that word suggests theyre on the way). Dont believe that theyve offered you the highest salary they can. Dont believe them when they say they cant negotiate your raise. And definitely dont believe them when they say this year has been really bad, but next year youre going to get hooked up on that promotion you want!
When a boss, HR rep or recruiter (or anyone playing a role in your career and financial success) states something that makes you tilt your head to the side and think huhthat seems sketch, dont just accept it.
As Ive said before, the car dealer will act like he cant budge on a number. But if you stand up and start walking to the door hell automatically find a discount for you. Companies are in it for the bottom line even when theyre negotiating things with their employees. They want to encourage you to stick around while also finding a way to save money. And it saves them money to give you a smaller raise, to skip a round of promotions, to make you work through Christmas. Dont fall for it.
The Groupthinker.
Groupthink is a psychological problem that runs rampant in workplaces. Even more if youve got a large population of longtermers in a corporation. Groupthink is why technology isnt updated, why policies are outdated, why theres no new blood (or ideas) on a team, why you hear the sentence you cant do that, thats not how weve always done it!
Its easy to spot these people, especially if youre new to a company. They sit in clumps together and they make bizarre statements in meetings, they do the same things every day and they complain when their life is disrupted by something (or someone) new.
If you fight against a mass of groupthinkers, you run a high risk of failure, persecution, derailment and tons of frustration. But if you engage and join them, you will become stupid and possibly unmarketable for your next career jump. Take your pick.
The Fearful One.
People do ridiculous things when theyre scared. Just ask anyone whos died in a horror movie (I mean, who drops the phone and runs up the stairs?!).
Fearful people will cause you serious amounts of trouble at work. If theyre scared of getting fired, they will find a way to point a finger at you. If their project is failing, they will suggest your role was to blame. Drowning people will grab whatever they can to keep their head above water. Dont stand too close and become that object.
And dont become the drowning person. If you ever feel worried about something at work, you sense something bad coming your way or you screw up big time, avoid the fear by taking some action. Talk to someone, your boss, your mentor or a peer to get information that will quell your fears. Or fess up and find out immediately what repercussions are headed your way for the screw-up so youre not worried about the unknowns. Do whatever you need to do in order to avoid becoming the fearful one.
Apathetic Guy.
The other day, a friend of mine posted a message on Facebook FB -2.08% stating her frustration that people keep calling her upcoming maternity leave a vacation. She mentioned a litany of things that have to be done while youre on maternity leave (none of it sounded remotely vacationish). She referenced this because she felt judged and persecuted for her decision to take the time off.
Consider now the single person. If you havent been in this demo for awhile, you might not be aware of this, but single people are also victims of workplace apathy. Ive actually heard the sentence, You can stay late tonight to finish this, right? I gotta get out of here and its not like youre going home to a family.
Hashtag awkward.
Everyone is dealing with something. Everyone feels judged and misunderstood every once in awhile. And everyone feels the sting from these moments. Show some compassion even when youre having trouble putting yourself in their shoes.
Dont be the apathetic coworker. The grass isnt always greener, even though it may appear so.
The Sore Loser.
Anytime youre successful or experience something great in life or your career, I guarantee you that someone somewhere will doubt that you earned it the good ol hard-working way. That someone somewhere is the sore loser.
A sore loser will think you got that deal because youve got an important last name. Or that you were hired because your Mom sits in the corner office. Or that you simply got lucky (literally and figuratively).
You cant stop a sore loser from thinking what they want and you cant convince them out of their opinion. The only way to battle a sore loser is to make sure theyre not right (it might surprise some of you ladies that yes, business can indeed be conducted outside the bedroom!).
Update: Its been called to my attention by several female readers that the comment above was offensive and diminishes the hard-earned success of females in the workplace. I realize now it was a poor example and misrepresented the very reason I have this column. It wasnt my goal to suggest that women are perpetuating a Mad Men-era stereotype and that men are absolved of their roles in these scenarios. While it exists, this in fact is NOT a common problem in the workplace. I mentioned it as merely a side note to emphasize the importance in making sure Sore Losers are not making accurate accusations by carrying yourself properly in the workplace.
Use your connections and your network to get ahead, but do your own dang work. Show results. Then the sore losers will disappear one by one.
Malicious Gossiper.
Theres harmless gossip and then theres malicious gossip. Harmless gossip isharmless. But you must avoid the malicious gossiper completely. In fact, put large amounts of space between you and this person.
Assume that since theyre willing to share really bad information with you, theyre sharing it with other people. Theyre kind of like the flu.
If you run across a malicious gossiper and they start talking, whatever you do, dont agree with them. Because the next thing you know, your sentence of Oh, I agree with you I bet she totally slept with that guy to get that job will be shortened to So and so just told me that so and so slept with so and so! And voila, youre screwed.
The Apologizer.
I recently attended an event where several startups were invited to pitch. One woman stood up to sell her idea to a room undoubtedly full of millions, a big opportunity for a small company. She looked sharp and ready. But then she opened with, Dont worry, this isnt a crappy website that does blah
Well shoot. For the remainder of her presentation, I assumed her website was crappy.
The Apologizer will discredit themselves as soon as they open their mouth. They will start a presentation with qualifying statements like the one above or they will ask for a raise by saying, I know we dont have a lot of money, but They lose these deals because they show a massive lack of confidence in the statement, regardless of topic.
You dont necessarily have to avoid this person. Just dont be this person. The company pays you a salary because they think youre worth it. You have every right to be in the room and to be having that conversation right then. Why act like you dont belong there?
Repeat the following statement as many times as you need to before you have an important conversation or make a presentation: Be confident, not cocky.
Then own the heck out of it. Your career depends on it.
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